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CUCUMBERS… The Many Uses!

Cucumbers stretch a salad too. In comparison to a lot of the other produce, they are still economical and they go in a citrus salad or vegetable salad.

CUCUMBER TIPS & TRICKS THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO MISS!! </p>
<p>1. Cucumbers contain most of the vitamins you need every day, just one cucumber contains Vitamin B1, Vitamin B2, Vitamin B3, Vitamin B5, Vitamin B6, Folic Acid, Vitamin C, Calcium, Iron, Magnesium, Phosphorus, Potassium and Zinc.</p>
<p>2.For a pick me up in the afternoon... Put down the caffeinated soda and pick up a cucumber. Cucumbers are a good source of B Vitamins and Carbohydrates that can provide that quick pick-me-up that can last for hours. Slice some and put in your water bottle.</p>
<p>3. If you rub a cucumber slice along your bathroom mirror, it will eliminate the fog and provide a soothing, spa-like fragrance.</p>
<p>4. Place a few slices of cucumber in a small pie tin and your garden will be free of pests all season long. The chemicals in the cucumber react with the aluminum to give off a scent undetectable to humans but drive garden pests crazy and make them flee the area.</p>
<p>5. Looking for a fast and easy way to remove cellulite before going out or to the pool? Try rubbing a slice or two of cucumbers along your problem area for a few minutes, the phytochemical in the cucumber cause the collagen in your skin to tighten, firming up the outer layer and reducing the visibility of cellulite. Works great on wrinkles too!!!</p>
<p>6. Want to avoid a hangover or terrible headache? Eat a few cucumber slices before going to bed and wake up refreshed and headache free.<br />
Cucumbers contain enough sugar, B vitamins and electrolytes to replenish essential nutrients the body lost, keeping everything in equilibrium, avoiding both a hangover and headache!</p>
<p>7. Looking to fight off that afternoon or evening snacking binge? Cucumbers have been used for centuries by European trappers, traders and explorers for quick meals to thwart off starvation.</p>
<p>8. Have an important meeting or job interview and you realize that you don’t have enough time to polish your shoes? Rub a freshly cut cucumber over the shoe, its chemicals will provide a quick and durable shine that not only looks great but also repels water.</p>
<p>9. Out of WD 40 and need to fix a squeaky hinge? Take a cucumber slice and rub it along the problematic hinge, and voila, the squeak is gone!</p>
<p>10. Stressed out and don’t have time for massage, facial or visit to the spa? Cut up an entire cucumber and place it in a boiling pot of water, the chemicals and nutrients from the cucumber will react with the boiling water and released in the steam, creating a soothing, relaxing aroma that has been shown to reduce stress in new mothers and college students during final exams.</p>
<p>11. Just finish a business lunch and realize you don’t have gum or mints? Take a slice of cucumber and press it to the roof of your mouth with your tongue for 30 seconds to eliminate bad breath, the photochemical will kill the bacteria in your mouth responsible for causing bad breath.</p>
<p>12. Looking for a ‘green’ way to clean your faucets, sinks or stainless steel? Take a slice of cucumber and rub it on the surface you want to clean, not only will it remove years of tarnish and bring back the shine, but it won’t leave streaks and won’t harm you fingers or fingernails while you clean.</p>
<p>Like It? Share It With Friends And Family.

CUCUMBER TIPS & TRICKS THAT YOU DON’T WANT TO MISS!!

1. Cucumbers contain most of the vitamins you need every day, just one cucumber contains Vitamin B1, Vitamin B2, Vitamin B3, Vitamin B5, Vitamin B6, Folic Acid, Vitamin C, Calcium, Iron, Magnesium, Phosphorus, Potassium and Zinc.

2.For a pick me up in the afternoon… Put down the caffeinated soda and pick up a cucumber. Cucumbers are a good source of B Vitamins and Carbohydrates that can provide that quick pick-me-up that can last for hours. Slice some and put in your water bottle.

3. If you rub a cucumber slice along your bathroom mirror, it will eliminate the fog and provide a soothing, spa-like fragrance.

4. Place a few slices of cucumber in a small pie tin and your garden will be free of pests all season long. The chemicals in the cucumber react with the aluminum to give off a scent undetectable to humans but drive garden pests crazy and make them flee the area.

5. Looking for a fast and easy way to remove cellulite before going out or to the pool? Try rubbing a slice or two of cucumbers along your problem area for a few minutes, the phytochemical in the cucumber cause the collagen in your skin to tighten, firming up the outer layer and reducing the visibility of cellulite. Works great on wrinkles too!!!

6. Want to avoid a hangover or terrible headache? Eat a few cucumber slices before going to bed and wake up refreshed and headache free.
Cucumbers contain enough sugar, B vitamins and electrolytes to replenish essential nutrients the body lost, keeping everything in equilibrium, avoiding both a hangover and headache!

7. Looking to fight off that afternoon or evening snacking binge? Cucumbers have been used for centuries by European trappers, traders and explorers for quick meals to thwart off starvation.

8. Have an important meeting or job interview and you realize that you don’t have enough time to polish your shoes? Rub a freshly cut cucumber over the shoe, its chemicals will provide a quick and durable shine that not only looks great but also repels water.

9. Out of WD 40 and need to fix a squeaky hinge? Take a cucumber slice and rub it along the problematic hinge, and voila, the squeak is gone!

10. Stressed out and don’t have time for massage, facial or visit to the spa? Cut up an entire cucumber and place it in a boiling pot of water, the chemicals and nutrients from the cucumber will react with the boiling water and released in the steam, creating a soothing, relaxing aroma that has been shown to reduce stress in new mothers and college students during final exams.

11. Just finish a business lunch and realize you don’t have gum or mints? Take a slice of cucumber and press it to the roof of your mouth with your tongue for 30 seconds to eliminate bad breath, the photochemical will kill the bacteria in your mouth responsible for causing bad breath.

12. Looking for a ‘green’ way to clean your faucets, sinks or stainless steel? Take a slice of cucumber and rub it on the surface you want to clean, not only will it remove years of tarnish and bring back the shine, but it won’t leave streaks and won’t harm you fingers or fingernails while you clean.

Like It? Share It With Friends And Family.

 

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Dandelions Are A Flower!

My latest in the CH Local Paper. I’d appreciate a positive comment on the bottom of the page… Even if you don’t read it! But I hope you do and enjoy. Laugh today, you might relate!  If you don’t… give it to your gardener.  HIT THE WORD DANDELIONS, IT WILL TAKE YOU TO THE ARTICLE.

http://chestnuthilllocal.com/blog/2013/07/19/chestnut-hill-overrun-by-dandelions-theyre-not-weeds/Dandelions

Be careful, it’s hot out!

This is a flower, not a weed.

This is a flower, not a weed.

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Posted in Blog, Comedy, Lifestyle

THE “YOUNGER” SENIOR CITIZEN

I admire people who work out regularly and are older than me. Let’s cut to the chase. Senior citizens are kicking my butt in physical fitness. The label “senior citizen” does not apply to these freaks of nature. For this article I am going to refer to these iron people as SC’s (senior citizens). Senior citizen is too long and repetitive to keep writing. It would take commitment and consistency to keep typing senior citizens which I’m lacking, as is my physical fitness regime… or lack of. The SC’s have it and it’s not a hobby. If I played tag with an SC and I was “IT” they would safely make it to the tree and I would be “IT” for a long long time unless one tripped. Reverse this, I’m being chased by a SC and within 50 yards, I would be tagged and out, the safe tree a good distance away.

Theses SC’s are all over Chestnut Hill. These SC’s are “ATHLETES” and they are not casual about their fitness routines. I think it’s their careers after their career. I see many bicycle riders, excuse me, I chose the wrong word, cyclists and joggers, wrong again, runners daily. I said DAILY! I see my regulars regularly. They don’t see me, they are focused on the task at hand. Pumping along, eyes focused straight ahead, and in their zone. No matter what the weather is searing heat, rain, and now cold, working out as if their lives depended on it. Well they probably do but there’s real passion or OCD going on. When doing my yard work or walking down my street I will see these sports persons go by. They are in full regalia, top of the line gear, reflector vests or neon yellow shirts in the evening go by, leaving a flash of light trail behind them sending me into a flash back of younger years. It’s really trippy.

I don’t consider them seniors. They don’t look like the picture in my mind’s eye of what a SC should look like. My mind sees old people who sit on benches with silver hair, wearing white sneakers, reading the paper, people watching and waving their canes to say hello to the people passing by that they have come to know. That is my plan in 20 years. I am looking forward to spending my time bench sitting. By the way Chestnut Hill needs more benches. Seriously. I have scouted out some locations that benches are needed. Who do I contact?

Have these SC’s always been athletic or did this happen later in life I wonder? I have been wondering about this a lot. I’m in that sucky place of early middle age (46) and my body is changing. I would tell you how but if your reading this it would be redundant for you to read, you’ve lived it. It’s time for me to accept these changes and take part with them because denial isn’t working, that accelerates these new “symptoms”.

I don’t belong to a gym but when I did one of the more popular classes was the silver sneakers class. Recently I accidentally called it the silver slippers class which my Mother quickly corrected. Her correction was fast and furious and I thought, Jeez you earned the right to slippers and benches, what’s with the hostility?

I was an athlete throughout my life. I then retired, not only from my career but from working out. I had kids… you know the rest. When I look in the mirror I see a resemblance of the woman I used to be, which is awesome considering how lazy I’ve become. All those years of training maintained muscle memory so I’m looking OK. Now my mind is losing memory as well as my muscles! Physically, I’m all busted up. The right side of my body is beaten down. I’ve had injuries throughout my life that I’ve worked through, quickly and easily, but these are ridiculous and won’t go away. My body is rebelling against my being lethargic. You would think it would be thanking me for taking it easy on it but it’s not! I’m used to muscle ware and tear but my “JOINTS”, I’ve crossed over to unknown territory and the landscape is treacherous. I had no idea how much damage I have done until recently.

How did I find out? I committed $50. for a month of unlimited classes at a local yoga studio. This is a big financial investment for me so I’ve decided to go six days a week and get my moneys worth. This goal is impossible and extremely disillusioned but hey, personality A. $50. bucks is a lot cheaper than a cushy rehab and manageable. Come December, I won’t be cushy. I am there to get down to business and lose weight. If I heal some injuries great but that’s not my motivation. Historically I’ve been brainwashed to think that I can perform physically like I used too, walk into any studio and take a class with no worries of it being too difficult. Friday, my ego schooled me that I can’t, sort of. I did the class and pretty well considering, but for my standards, let’s just say I didn’t bring my A game, I don’t have an A game anymore.  

Hot” yoga is the new trend. Everything old is new again just like the SC’s. Hot yoga used to be called Bikram, like juice cleansing used to be called fasting. Now it’s not PC. Of course I took a hot yoga class, jump right in there Mary and take the hardest one! What the difference between the two yogas, nothing but a few degrees. Hot yoga classes can range from 90 degrees to 105. Many stay below 100. The heat is said to have many benefits, from detoxing your system through sweat to improving flexibility. I desperately need to detox off of Halloween candy, I have a hangover and my body is full of cobwebs. I’m blowing out the month of November in a hot box.

I go to my first hot yoga class and it is brutal. The second I walked in I started to sweat, and I hadn’t put my mat down yet. Seated on a mat in front of me was practicing yogi. She was awesome and has the body I want. Lucky for me I was standing next to the wall so when I fell of balance, which I did many times, I could hold onto the wall. I started to think “I hope I’m not distracting (the yogi).” Then I realized that I shouldn’t feel guilty of my shaky, unstable and audible breathing body, I’m helping the yogi! One principal of yoga is to be single-minded, completely focused on what you’re doing. If she noticed my non-yogi self than she’s not a yogi after all! Yes, it’s a practice and I believe

I was sent there to help her reach Nirvana sooner. I also realized that I AM a yogi because my ego wasn’t invested in my performance level at all. I easily admit that I don’t work out, so there. I’m sure no one noticed me anyway… they are all single-minded mind you.

I labored through the class and fought the urge to walk out for a breather. That was an extremely hard mental workout. My lungs and body wanted a shot of cool air like my addiction wants a candy bar but I white knuckled it and stayed. At the end of class you do a posture known as Shavasana, the corpse pose. Shavasana is perhaps the most important part of yoga practice says Wikipedia. Lying on the back, the arms and legs are spread at about 45 degrees, the eyes are closed while focusing on deep breathing. This is my favorite posture, and the one I am the best at. My heart was pounding so hard that I swear if someone looked over at me they would’ve seen my heart pumping through my chest like you see in cartoons. That’s how fast and hard my heart was beating. I actually started praying that I wouldn’t have a heart attack or stroke. That’s the sort of thing that would happen to me. “UNHEALTY LADY TRIES TO GET HEALTHY AND DIES IN THE PROCESS.”

After the class, I leaked my way back to the dressing room where I immediately went to the water cooler, chugged a few cups and fell to a bench. When my nausea and dizziness passed, I looked around and noticed that the class was mostly full of baby boomers and SC’s! They were laughing, dressing and socializing like they just took a walk. I was ease dripping, I mean dropping, and heard about the errands they were going to run the rest of the day! My ambition was to go home to bed, and I did.

Now my motivation is no longer solely to lose weight. It is to spy on the SC’s and see how they live. I have a list of valid excuses like kids not to exercise. I bet the SC’s could come up with a list of their own like arthritis, recovering from a hip replacement or simply wanting to stay home and read. But they don’t, they are there, working their butts off and kicking mine. Am I inspired by them yes, but not for their commitment to exercise. I’m inspired by their thinking. Whatever coconut juice they’re drinking, I want some. My biggest obstacle isn’t time or body limitations, it’s my thinking. It’s hard, I don’t want to, blah blah blah. Well the SC’s are teaching me if you keep doing what you’re doing you’re going to keep getting what you’re getting, and for me that’s sustained injuries caused by extra weight. With age comes wisdom and I’ve secretly found some mentors to help me along the path of becoming a healthy, HAPPY, productive, middle-ager on the way to SC land. Did I mention their bodies are smokin hot? Well the regulars are and it shows.

 

November 8, 2012

 

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Ultimas Palabras / BY: IMMORTAL TECHNIQUE

A new American revolution has begun,

Not against the forces of a colonial kingdom

But a rebellion against an oppressor that has risen among us,

It is not a foreign invasion we have to fear,

Rather the threat of a force within our nation

That has usurped what was once a dream of having the greatest democracy ever known to man,

We now live in a world where the population has grown exponentially,

And the planet is running out of resources to sustain us all,

We in the inner-city and those struggling in the suburban ghettos may not realize it yet,

But make no mistake,

The people who control the technology and run every enterprise that makes up our world,

Have seen this coming for a long time,

The ideas of renewable energy,

Global warming,

The idea of collectively working,

Were purposefully bought out, derailed, demonized, or corrupted,

In favor of an economic structure designed by a monetary caste system,

In a desperate attempt to convince us that we need to maintain that extravagant existence,

They’ve pretended we might share in their dream,

That we can justify any inhumanity in its name,

Out of this blind ignorance was born the curse of slavery,

Many of the founders of this nation were themselves Masons,

That is not a Left wing or Right wing conspiracy theory,

It is a widely known and accepted fact,

So then explain to me how a nation founded by men,

Who not only understood the long and complicated history of Europe,

But also that of Africa,

Could permeate such a lie in convincing the American public,

That one race of men was superior and one inferior,

When in fact we know that all the early men,

The men who created civilization and every aspect of what we see today,

The foundation of all human life,

Were from Africa,

The greatest cowardice of course came not with slavery itself,

Unfortunately,

But with the excuses for slavery,

For if America had been as brave as the Roman Empire and all other empires that have come after her,

And claimed “No, we were just stronger and that’s why we took you”,

Then when slavery was over racism would’ve probably followed in suit,

But instead it was the social lie,

The religious lie that was told,

That stayed in the mind of people,

That separated one human being from another,

In order to distract us from the issues of class and freedom,

They created issues around religion and race to dominate the world for centuries to come,

Some claim that they respect that they respect the culture of life in this country,

They cry out for indignity of children that are slaughtered before they are born,

But God has not penetrated their souls,

For they have no empathy,

Nothing in their cold hearts for the 100s of 1,000s of lives we have taken in our wars overseas,

For that which they call “collateral damage”,

Which the are the burnt and damaged children of the world,

They have no prayers for them,

Only snide commentary on the internet and laughter in their hearts,

And yet you claim to be one with God,

Huh,

We talk about immigration in this country,

Might doesn’t make right ladies and gentleman,

It just makes right now,

What we are saying to the rest of the world,

Is one day when America grows weak,

One day when her legions falter,

On the day when her economy crumbles,

China, Russia, Europe, whatever power has arisen,

All you have to do is come here and conquer us in a few military excursions,

And then you too can set up shop here,

And in 100 years you can tell every red-blooded American,

No, you are an illegal human being,

I am the true citizen,

I have all the rights,

You have no rights”,

Maybe you forgot how you got this country,

Maybe you take for granted the blood, the sweat, the tears,

That the people who live in practical serfdom shed everyday,

For we may not run America, but we make America run,

We talk about the Law,

Yet,

How many indignities have been legal in the past?

How many treaties with Native Americans have we broken?

How many international laws have we violated?

And,

Speaking of laws ,

How can a corporation be regulated by a government that is funded and controlled by corporations?

How can there be accountability,

For people who see a profit margin above the lives of Americans?

Above the lives of human beings in other countries?

We have taken the soul out ourselves and placed them inside machines,

My words of course,

Will be marginalized, demonized,

In typical fashion,

Anytime you dare to question the power structure they say you hate America,

No, I love this country,

I see its beauty everyday in its people,

And I love it a lot more than those who have abandoned the American worker,

That have chosen to exploit and try to take away benefit she has,

Those that attempt to make excuses for every atrocity committed,

In the name of supposed freedom,

Those who demand accountability from everyone,

But offer none themselves,

Who favor contracts over lives,

Who favor invasion and control over organic democracy overseas,

The greatest flaw that any intelligent person has is to think they’re smarter than everyone else,

And so the government has planted its spies amongst us,

We have planted our spies among them,

They have infiltrated every branch of the American government,

They have retrieved names, data, hard numbers,

The paper trail that will expose those that truly control this country,

Those that control the political parties,

Those that control the oil industry,

The energy,

Those that stand behind the companies faceless,

Whose names have never been revealed,

Until tod.. (GUNSHOT)

 

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“Beauty in Grief… Honoring Your Furry Family Members in Death”.

The Privilege of Honoring our Dog.

In the last two years I had to put down my 14-year-old beagle Lucy and Tuesday my 16-year-old cat Thomas, who within a matter of two days diminished into a cat I didn’t know. His kidneys just went. Needless to say I am numb, broken-hearted and grieving.

I don’t think our culture honors the transition of dying that one shares with their pets.  Death is a rite of passage. Ceremonies and rituals are celebratory and healing.  Death can be beautiful. A eulogy praises someone. An obituary is an announcement of the death with a biography. Animals touch our lives, souls and hearts in ways that human beings can’t. This is a combination of both eulogy/obituary for my animals Lucy and Thomas honoring them both in life and the transition into death. It is important.  Here is who they were, their personalities and how my affected my life.

In 1996 I was a single woman living in a studio apartment in New York City. I was a professional dancer, an entertainment gypsy. I lived many places and moved wherever the next job was and had no plans of retiring that lifestyle. New York was another temporary stop on my journey to the next show, so I thought. Walking around town, without consideration, I walked into a pet store “to look” at the puppies, and Lucy picked me. I wasn’t looking to adopt a dog, I had no information about the beagle breed. I didn’t grow up with a dog. When I looked at her, my spirit knew, we were meant to be together. I took her home.

Within a week, impulsively, I don’t know why, I found myself in a taxi going to the ASPCA to get a kitten. I hadn’t been thinking of adopting a cat. I thought gray kittens were cute?? That’s not what I got. I walked in to see the cats and there she was, the kitten I came for, gray and white, sweet, a delight. Very calm and easy-going. “I pick her” I told myself. I wandered over to another cage just “to look” with four of five kittens in it. Thomas, named “Adonis” at the time, was the rowdiest one in the bunch. Black and white, full of sass. Every time I put my finger through the bars, his paws would latch on to it and he would start play biting. He was funny and he kept meowing at me. He was completely the opposite of my gray kitty. I looked to her, she was sleeping and I said to the lady “I’ll take him” and I brought Thomas home.

I had adopted a puppy and a kitten within three days of each other. They loved each other and were soul mates, became best friends and co-created my family. They changed my life, who I was, and who I would become. They loved me unconditionally, until I learned how to love myself, they taught me that. I had been set on a path that I didn’t design. I would travel down it, my next new gig. At 29 years old, I would start to grow up.

Lucy embodied Wisdom. She had big sweet soulful eyes. She loved to chase squirrels in the park. They would out run her to safety up a tree. Lucy would then proceed to stand with her two front paws on the trunk of the tree, white-tipped tail in hunting position and howl and howl at those squirrels. If I let her, she would have stayed there for months. I knew nothing of the breed so when I walked her, she would want to smell everything, and I let her. I felt guilty when I tugged her away. I told a friend and wise words were spoken, “Mary, there’s always another smell,” I got it. Lucy was patient by nature. Very patient except when it came to chicken. EVERY time I roasted a chicken she could not control herself. She would stand in the kitchen and tap dance for her dinner, the nails in her paws would persistently tap-tap-tap, haranguing me until I gave in and gave her some. She could ruin an entire evening whining and tap dancing for that chicken. Yes, she ruled the roost. Lucy was a dancer too.

I had very dark days, and she knew. One time I remember I was quietly sobbing in the shower on a different floor and she came and laid down outside the tub. That wasn’t the first and it wasn’t the last time she gave me the will to live. She always new, she always came to be a presence, holding the space, staying by my side. She was Wisdom and Love.

Thomas was an explorer. Another animal that had to be heard. My studio had a ladder to a loft I could crawl into and sleep. Literally the loft was three feet high. I used it for storage as well. Thomas used it as a playground, every time I tried to sleep. He was exhausting. As a kitten he learned to climb the ladder. He would stretch his tiny body, leaning on the wall, and do pull ups, rung by rung. Unbelievable. He was a rascal. Lucy didn’t have the skill of scaling the wall so I would crawl to the ladder, climb down and carry her up fire woman style. I never crated my animals, we had a family bed, up to the end. Thomas was a boxer too. Lucy would engage him every night at 5 pm. Happy hour was on. They would chase each other around and around barking and tumbling. Thomas never backed down. When necessary, he would pull out his paws and starting swinging. “No dog would take him”, Lucy never won. Thomas would then proudly saunter off, both animals knowing they were playmates.

There are many stories I could write about, like all the times we moved, when I had my children, when I adopted my other dog Henri who is seven now or how they transformed over the years but gratefully I had many years and experiences with them. To many stories to tell. The essence of who they were, never changed. Lucy was Wisdom and Love. Thomas was spry and courageous. I loved them dearly, words are inadequate.

Both deaths were beautifully sacred, full of light and love.  Myself and my two boys had the opportunity to prepare ourselves, as much as possible. We said goodbye in our home, creating personal ceremonies with candles, flowers, blankets, and toys that our pets loved. We spoke words of tenderness, endearment and thankfulness holding them. We communicated with our souls.

We decorated the vets room as well and carried out services, being fully present when the final injections took place. It was a privilege and an honor. There is beauty in death if one chooses to accept it as a transition and honor the process. Both animals left being thanked with gratitude and love. This doesn’t take the pain away. Grief does not have an expiration date.

When Lucy passed the first thing I did was write a poem, here is an excerpt. I wrote this is 2012, straight from a heart of grief:

The moment we met and now 14 years later we never have had a fight. I’ve ripped into her a few times that’s true but she responded in pure loving light.  My agenda to bring her into my life was I knew that I needed a friend. What she’s brought to my life has been so much more I’m in debt to her up to the end. 

See she saved my life literally yes she did, I was living in darkness alone. I was isolated, confused, abandoned by me, I couldn’t even pick up the phone. Depression moved in, I was starting to spin, light too much for my soul to bare. But when I brought her in she was bigger than me and I had to deliver on my plan. 

I was in New York City a hustling bustling town I had made that city my home. The people the sites the noise and bright lights and yet still I felt alone. The glamour, the people, the culture, the vibe; laughter interaction is right by my side. How could this be with excitement everywhere that I would be stricken with my soul’s despair? 

So I let her move in and we started a life I would wake up and grumble I don’t have the fight. She would just nudge me and patiently wait till I got on my feet to start a new day. A walk in the park sounds like fun” she would say and I so had to fight the words “please go away”.  

Just one walk at a time it might change your mood” and it did she was right we began a routine. Three times a day we would go to the park and slowly I crept on out of my dark.  Sun, rain, and wind we would get up and go, out of the door and on with the show.  I always had her by my side when I felt awkward talking to others standing by. 

What she taught me is get up and get out, get moving, all is well if you only will start. That first year of friendship she changed my life I lived in the daytime and not the nightlife. Our relationship continues it is bigger than me Every big event wedding, babies, divorce, moves, she never craggy. She just flows how I roll and is always just she…

            I am grieving the loss of Thomas now. The pain is fresh. I took myself to the ocean the other day and added a few gallons of tears. I am depressed, but I know, this too shall pass. The impact these precious souls had on my life is life itself, they gave it to me. They were my reasons to live. We grew up together. We were constant companions. We had our routines, our favorite places to nap and our own language. I still say “here Lucy” and my son will say Mom you called Lucy and I realize I did. I want to call out to my Thomas now. The tutututu sound with my tongue that called him or my scratching the bed to come join me. “Our talk,” but he’s not here, in the physical, and my heart yearns and it believes that we will meet again. My best friends.

Posted in Blog

BEAUTY IN GRIEF… When your family pet dies

 


WE ARE FAMILY

In the last two years I had to put down my 14-year-old beagle Lucy and Tuesday my 16-year-old cat Thomas, who within a matter of two days diminished into a cat I didn’t know. His kidneys just went. I adopted them at the same time.  Needless to say I am numb, broken-hearted and grieving.

Both deaths were beautifully sacred, full of light and love.  Myself and my boys had the opportunity to prepare ourselves, as much as possible. We said goodbye in our home, creating personal ceremonies with candles, flowers, blankets, and toys that our pets loved. We spoke words of tenderness, endearment and thankfulness holding them. We communicated with our souls.

We decorated the vets room as well and carried out services, being fully present when the final injections took place. It was a privilege and an honor. There is beauty in death if one chooses to accept it as a transition and honor the process. Both animals left being thanked with gratitude and love. This doesn’t take the pain away. Grief does not have an expiration date.

I don’t think our culture honors this transition with their pets.  Death is a rite of passage. Ceremonies and rituals are celebratory and healing.  Death can be beautiful.  A eulogy praises someone. An obituary is an announcement of the death with a biography. My question to you is  have you written an obituary about your furry family member? As you know they touch our lives, souls and hearts in ways that human beings can’t.  I will be writing an article which is a combination of both eulogy/obituary for my animals Lucy and Thomas honoring them both in life and the transition into death. It is important.  It will include who they were, their personalities and how my animals affected my life.  Our special bonds and relationships. If you would like to write a short obituary about your loved one and send it to me, I am collecting them to be published. 

This is the poem I wrote for Lucy, straight from the heart of grief  in 2012. 

                                                                                          There Is None Like She and There Will Never Be

I have a very good friend of mine actually she’s the tops
We met years ago on a hectic day, when I saw her I had to stop
I walked in and said “hello nice to meet you” her welcome to me was pure joy
I knew then and there we were destined soul mates and that we would then walk out the door

The moment we met and now 14 years later we never have had a fight
I’ve ripped into her a few times that’s true but she responded in pure loving light
My agenda to bring her into my life was I knew that I needed a friend
What she’s brought to my life has been so much more I’m in debt to her up to the end

See she saved my life literally yes she did, I was living in darkness alone
I was isolated, confused, abandoned by me, I couldn’t even pick up the phone
Depression moved in, I was starting to spin, light too much for my soul to bare
But when I brought her in she was bigger than me and I had to deliver on my plan

I was in New York City a hustling bustling town I had made that city my home
The people the sites the noise and bright lights and yet still I felt alone
The glamour, the people, the culture, the vibe; laughter interaction is right by my side
How could this be with excitement everywhere that I would be stricken with my soul’s despair?

So I let her move in and we started a life I would wake up and grumble I don’t have the fight
She would just nudge me and patiently wait till I got on my feet to start a new day
“A walk in the park sounds like fun” she would say and I so had to fight the words “please go away”
“Just one walk at a time it might change your mood” and it did she was right we began a routine.

Three times a day we would go to the park and slowly I crept on out of my dark
Sun, rain, and wind we would get up and go, out of the door and on with the show
I always had her by my side when I felt awkward talking to others standing by
What she taught me is get up and get out, get moving, all is well if you only will start

That first year of friendship she changed my life
I lived in the daytime and not the nightlife
Our relationship continues it is so bigger than me
Every big event wedding, babies, divorce, moves, she never craggy
She just flows how I roll and is always just she

The years have been kind to my beautiful friend
This life is not forever there will come an end
She’s slowing down with the physical stuff
Her hips and her eyes and her fears are getting rough
but we handle them with dignity and grace

She IS wisdom, grace, peace, joy, love and bliss
She IS an angel a messenger of faith
She lays asleep on the floor snoring, not because she is bored but because all is well in this race

She is my dog Lucy

These words are inadequate.

 

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I am human and my ego is happy!

To boast, brag, show off, gloat and blow my own horn is the opposite of humility.  However, I got published on the front page of my local newspaper and that makes me HAPPY!

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So You Want to Have the Perfect Wedding

BALANCED BRIDE

In three words I can sum up everything I’ve learned about life: it goes on”… Robert Frost.

So you want to have the perfect wedding. Well guess what, it is already so relax. You will have a dress, have shoes on your feet, your partner will know you are the most beautiful woman in the room, food will be served, people will dance, and you will get married. Now read this next sentence out loud. My wedding will be perfect because my love and I will say YES to becoming one in holy matrimony. Isn’t that the point?

I know it’s not that simple but I want to shed some perspective with you that I hope helps your unrealistic goal of perfection and help calm those nerves that are barely staying under control. You are experiencing a huge transition and it is only normal to feel overwhelmed. It’s all OK! There is a lot to do but busy does not mean perfect or have to be stressful. You don’t have to do it alone. Ask for help. Let people help you.

Recently I asked bridal industry expert Donna Ennis, Founder and President at “Top Wedding Sites, Inc.” as well as the online bridal resource “Pop the Questions” www.topweddingsites.com  what were the top three stressors a bride experiences? First on the list was trying to plan the perfect wedding. Keep posted for the other two, I will be blogging.

Many brides want to have the “perfect wedding.” There are websites called the “Perfect Wedding”. Blogs are written on how to have the perfect wedding and the media will tell you that you can have the perfect wedding. Aren’t you sick of hearing the word perfect by now? I am.

I wanted to know what is a perfect wedding so I googled it. I discovered that when I googled “what is the perfect wedding?” a list of things came up. The dress, the flowers, the cake, favors, music, first dance, seating charts, photographer, color combos, the event venue etc. etc. etc. and I could go on and on. I was looking for the weather but I guess “whomever” plans the perfect wedding admitted to themselves that they can’t control the weather. Imagine, on your wedding day it rains! Will you still get married? YES! And I suggest you and your love laugh, kiss and dance in the rain. That would be creating a memory that will satisfy your hearts and souls.

What I didn’t read were the words that will give your wedding the qualities that feel like perfection. Words like love, affection, devotion, friendship, marriage, partner, joy, gratitude, family, health, spirituality, integrity, poise, trust, faith or honor. Where are they??? Let go of any expectations of what “perfect” is and take the actions necessary to have a wonderful celebration. Then let it go. Don’t get caught up with the “stuff”. Honor yourself, honor your love, enjoy this special time when you are able to be with you. It’s precious.

Your wedding day is one of the most important days in your life. It is a ritual witnessed by friends and family of you and your beloved confessing your commitment to each other in marriage. It is a celebration, and it is one day. If you focus on the feelings, give yourself time to meditate on them, place them in your heart mind and soul, I promise, you will be glowing from the inside out and feel the glory of real love and connection to what is important, the vows that you make and the steps that you take to transition you into this next new chapter in your life… marriage.

 

Written by: Mary Gulivindala

Mary is the Founder of Blue Print Life & Wellness Coaching which specializes in Bridal Coaching. To learn more about the services offered please call 267-505-1779 or go to www.blueprintlife-wellnesscoaching.com . Contact: mary@blueprintlife-wellnesscoaching.com. Please contact for speaking engagements and availability.

 

 

 


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The Glass Is…

The Glass is not Half Full or Half Empty, it is Just Too Big

We all know the expression the glass is either half full or half empty. It is used as a question to gage how a person views a situation, whether they see it as positive or negative. It is about a persons perspective. Well I see the glass as just too big and know that you do too, if your breathing.

Life has become extremely busy and at times overwhelming. With work, add in a commute time, family, add in an aging parent or sick one, children and their schedules plus the wonderful but consuming technology ie. Email, Google, Facebook, Linkeden and Twitter if you choose to use social networking, you will see or feel that there are not enough hours in a day to do what is required let alone have the luxuries of down time, hobbies and a social life.

So how can you simplify your life?

There are the usual solutions:

  • Better time management – take away a couple hours of sleeping
  • Write down a to do list – which if your like me put too many tasks down a day that don’t get accomplished and them move them to the next day. By weeks end I have a list longer of the things I didn’t do than did.
  • Prioritize – Do I take the dog for a walk or put down paper?
  • Delegate – Unless you can pay an assistant, the only people I can delegate to are my kids and they are too young to drive, go to the market, or use the oven.

The reality is you can’t do it alone, or do it as well as you want without sacrifices to your health, sanity or self esteem. That is why I like being a transitional life and wellness coach, to help you. My life experiences living in different cites nationally and abroad, as well as my education have lead me to the life coaching profession. Whether you live in Philadelphia, Los Angeles, Atlanta, Chicago, London or Tokyo, all people need support. It’s a common factor. Working with a coach makes life balanced, efficient, and allows you more time to focus on what you want to do rather than what you have to do.

Enter stage left…me. What I do is guide you to move towards your objectives smoothly and efficiently and effectively . When you come to me with a goal or goals you want to achieve, you came to me because you need help. You don’t have the availability to take the time to sit down, strategize, research and assess how to reach your goals in a timely stress free manner, or the resources I do. Taking time out of your day to do those things would just add to your already hectic life. My job is to access, articulate and make a list of action steps with you to do. I will inspire and guide you to successfully accomplish your goal in a timely manner, dependent upon how willing and committed you are to do the work. IT’S ONE LESS THING FOR YOU TO PUT ON YOUR TO DO LIST… YEA!!! It is now on mine.

This is not to say that I tell you what to do, you are involved in the process because you are the process and the answers lie within you. My job is to keep you focused, moving forward and accountable to yourself. I encourage you to think in different ways. I will get your creative juices going, and you do have them, to think outside the box and empower you in ways that you didn’t know lived within you to change your life whether it is to to loose weight or build a strong foundation for your marriage you will succeed.

One step at a time we will get to your destination.

 

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